What we all want....

Somehow... whenever friends, old or new, sit n talk...this topic does come up... always... n everybody has so much to say..sometimes...so much not to say... yup...

One night.. after a party.. while all of us are sittin around on the couch... laughin... smiling...n giggling....always... It comes up..someone.. somehow..brings it up... yup... Love...

Topic of Love, relationships, expectations, marriage n apparently... the good old, what does the opposite sex want? what boys want, what the girls want... conceptions, mis-conceptions...n after that round couch discussion... u just seem to feel so much clearer n light hearted n alive... n the guys just seem so much more than the always joking, never serious drunken goof ups they were few hours a go.. :-) i mean seriously.... n the girls.. Your respect for them just increased ten times....

This talk about Love, n the opposites, does bring something out of everybody... something that people always try hard to keep low... The biggest flirt talks about being used n thrown... The nerdiest guy, speaks such beautiful poetry that u can never even imagine him to speak... n the brightest ,funniest n most bubbling girl, is teary eyed... n the most talkative of the lot- silent...

Have you experienced that? At that moment, you know.. that these r the real people... The people that you have never seen before in your friends, n u may, never see again in a long time...

Love does affect everyone, doesnt it? well..

I will tell you one fact today... A fact tht I know...A fact that most girls dono.... But a fact that most girls think they know... A fact that they badly want to know... A fact they r not going to believe....

When guys hang out.. Close friends I mean...... Not just any bunch of guys...Buddies.... when they hang out... To put in simple words...When they are themselves.... They never care about the sexiest girl n school... they never talk about that voluptous actress from that last movie...

N they don't for sure, talk their dreams of the 'should be' perfect girl... They talk truth... They r plain, about how they dont expect an angel..how they would simply like the plain girl they see and how it would be so simple for her to please them... they just want the girl to put n minimum effort to keep the ship sailing.... they r all prepared for the compromise..

How they wouldnt mind her being another man's girl before... and how if she simply loved them, it would be enough for them to forget n forgive anything she had ever done before... They even talk like saints... About how they are not saints themselves... :-)

It is true... but when it comes to a guy speaking to a girl...Teling her about the girl he would love, He will always explain what he would like in his girl.. in his wife... he longs for... How he would like her to be smart, to share his passions, to be beautiful.... but always hides how he would forget all this n love the girl who can just love him back...

That is the truth n all true love stories... They love each other just for the love....

but guys... I know some of us have lost our faith in the four letter 'BS'.... I personally feel love is crap most of the times... What the hell is it... if not a sex hunt...? But then again... Give ur heart another chance... yes, you were hurt... It was bad... it broke u down... but... There must be a girl somewhere out there whose just born for you... a girl who will love you, even with all her flaws, will love u back....

n girls.. there is a guy out there who would treat you rite... accept his weakness n cuddle up n give it to you to take care of him...

Reminds me of the few lines I read in a Hallmark store...

Dance as if no one can see you,
Sing like no can hear you,
n Love like you've never been hurt...

Yes... It may hurt you sometimes....if it hurts, our friends are always there those idiot girls n guys who can make you smile no matter what... so, go for it....

You may never know what a guy or a girl really look for in the other... but it doesnt matter...
If you truly love, those dont matter...

Enchanted with Autumn....

One of the most beautiful things I saw in this trip, is not one thing, but a season...
There is a season called Autumn... There is no autumn from where I come from...
Only summer..and the rains..

Spring is like the perfect dressed ,cheerful , beautiful girl... Everybody likes her,I would like her too... but to me, autumn is the simple, smiling, plain girl that you see... The girl who is not beautiful...but cute... in just the plain clothes she is on... spring's beauty is in colours... Autumn ...Its something else...

How beautiful can death be? Just as beautiful as life can be...Autumn is beautiful...In a way that is special... That is what autumn is... beauty found where we don't expect it... A raindrop, a waterfall, snowfall, Autumn leaf... what is common to them... Their beauty lies in their fall....

You see, in autumn, Brown is not brown.. Brown is orange,brown is gold ... filling the ground, spreading a floor... gliding through the air.. downfall.. the air is not cold.. not cold to freeze..but cool enough to give the tingling goosebumps..The sun is out..but its not burning... Just enough shine to to light your day up...

It makes me feel like falling in love... I wonder... about the reason its said, people 'fall' in love... :-)

The streets which look washed n cleaned every morning from the rain at the nights...but the real beauty is the sun shining on the wetness glistning... I dono.. everything seems to be happen in slow motion...n in sepia... The cold breeze... touching your earlobes... Autumn..

Its a transition... from one holiday season to another... from summer into christmas... Its a transition....from heat to cold... Summer is beautiful... Snow is beautiful too...but the most beautiful thing, is the travel of the season from summer to winter... the most beautiful thing is autumn...

But..Would I like it to be autumn always? :-) No... Autumn is beautiful.. yes just as i said..But it's the summer heat n winter cold that make Autumn so much more special.. Autumn is like the beauty of a girl's tears... My girl is most beautiful when she cries... But I wouldn't want her to cry always... I want her tears just enough for my fingers wipe... I want autumn, only as much...

well, I actually wouldnt be here typing this blogs if not for my friends..yup..I owe all credit to them..how? Its their abscence that has made me return to blog.. Busy is the word I hear often nowadays..and strangely, I seem to understand.. It is bound to happen..Its the rule.

I never had to type anything and let people read..I just had people,friends,who would listen..I had to only speak,anytime..day or night..a friend for any occassion,A friend to cry, a friend to laugh a friend to confide,to console,to guide, to conspire,to fight, to encourage..friends..they were always there..ya..'were' always there..Now..I need someone to listen..someone who is not too busy right now..someone who would not 'get back to me later'..some one who is not away from the phone..someone who somehow missed my mails.. So,I am writing to u,the unknown internet reader.. I donn wann u to console me,I donn wann appreciations.I just need 5 minutes of your time. Five minutes of your eyes. Five minutes of your mind.

Well, The saddest thing in the world is when you know something is dying,something is going away slowly,something that's within your reach,so close to you, but there is nothing you can do about it..but watch..

Memories fade,I know..but so fast?ney..Its justtemporary..I would soon bid gud bye to this blog again..my friends would be there..yes..They would be there to listen..to talk,to fight n to laugh..

I read somewhere..

" When you part from your friend,grieve not;
For that which you love most in him may be clearer in his absence,
as the mountain to the climber is clearer from the plain."

I keep reading it...true..

Hai,
Today was......actually the day isnt over yet...So,today is my Birthday.84-94-2004-2006,hmmm... 22 years have gone by since I was pulled into this world by some lady doctor whose name my mom so clearly remembers(she told me just a minute ago and I already forgot it..) and still I dont think I have done anything that makes all my years of being alive worthwhile...

I asked myself a question today,"If I die this moment,what are the things I would have regretted of not doing?" Would I be able to say,like the great Vito Corleone that "Life is beautiful" at the moment of my death? It must be disturbing to people who read to think of a fellow talking about his death on his Birthday..but we all do it....In our hearts and in our minds...My questions gave me answers that made me shiver.

If I am dying this moment, The first thing that I would think about are my wasted talents . I know nobody will believe if I said I used to have the talent of the brush and that I could paint or sketch anything I saw...And if I said I was a very good player at shuttle and I can still run for miles without taking a break...

I have the gift of the Gab,but what purpose does it serve?I make merry,I had saved my face at times but I still couldnt get through the HR with my all pleasing language that my friends fancy in me...The guys told me I could never fail a HR...wel,believe me,It isnt the only time I failed to live up!

Ofcourse I had a good nickwith shuttle,but its been years since I even gripped a shuttle raquet...whats the use?But those friends who used to play with me , Loved my game more that me...

I had the talent of the pen,where have I shined? Do I have any prizes to trumpet the skill of my pen?No..Here again only my friends feel my words are really worth something,then again...

Then comes my family.Have I ever served anything pleasing to my Dad?NO Have I ever done anything that didnt turn out to blow up on my mom?NO Have I ever given my sister,a person so proud of me, any real reason to be proud?NO.

My country?NO.My World?NO.Have I wiped hunger off a poor guy with my own money?NO.Have I ever stuck on to a resolution made?NO.Have I ever put in my full effort in anything I do?NO.

I am sinking.What would my life be worthy of?Nothing?Really...It cant be...Then the angels smiled at me...

One thing that I would NOT regret if I die today,this moment was, all The friends I had earned through out my life...Ofcourse I have torn my skin many times while picking these roses,but neverthless the Thorns showed me the value of these roses.

I have been truthful to all my friends.I love them like I love myself.I have never been as happy as I have been with my friends...

If my life ends today,I would definitely die a Good friend to all my friends,and a good man to my enemies...that,that feeling made me forget all the other regrets that would pass me in my death...I dont care,I am ready to die any day!

P.S..If I bored u,forgive me...afterall this is my first post!